Greatest fears, part 3

I have this weird obsession with PostSecret. I check it weekly and compulsively save the ones that I can relate to, or that make me laugh. And I was recently looking through the ones I had saved when I came across this one.


Seeing as how I posted a blog on the topic somewhat recently (more than one, actually), I figured this was appropriate. I actually have nightmares about this stuff. Tell me my subconscious isn't fucked up. I mean, who has nightmares about this? The sad thing is, I've heard it so many times. Actually, I got this just last week when a close friend told me something that a mutual friend had said to her, about how he liked me as a person, and he'd probably sleep with me, but he didn't want to date me. Now, I'm glad that said person doesn't want to date me, because if he did, I wouldn't reciprocate and that would be somewhat awkward.

I suppose I could even go so far as to say that I should be flattered. At the risk of sounding concieted (and I assure you, I am not; tone and inflection are difficult to convey via Internet), I will say that there have been a lot of guys in recent years who have wanted to be with me, in a purely physical sense. But in true spoiled rotten fashion, I am not flattered; on the contrary, I am offended. I think it is the basest form of backhanded compliment to only want a girl for her body. One is essentially saying, "Yes, I find you attractive; however your personality sucks and I want nothing to do with you on anything but a physical level."

Am I the only one who is disgusted by that train of thought?

And I cannot help but wonder if my personality is really so abrasive, that the only thing I'm really good for is sex.

In fact, I put myself in mind of song lyrics from one of my favorite bands:

"I'm all right in bed, but I'm better with a pen"

Sound about right?

Oh, who am I kidding...I'm really not that good of a writer either.

So...what do I have going for me?